Loss of Virginity
by CN Winters
Summary: One of our gals reflects on their 'first time'.


**Title**: Loss of Virginity  
**Author**: CN Winters  
**Fandom**: Xena Fanfiction, Xena fanfic, Xena fan fiction, Xena and Gabrielle fanfiction, Xena fiction  
**Rating**: M  
**Disclaimers**: These characters belong to Universal and I'm not trying to offend. Just trying to be creative. There's a lotta love and a little sex between two women (ohh you know who) so if you not 18 or older, come back at a later date. And if this is illegal where you live, why are you living there anyway? Move and read my story.  
**Synopsis**: One of our gals reflects on their first time.  
**Feedback**: Drop me a line anytime!

**Loss of Virginity**

I know you came here for a story. You want to know where, when, why and who. I know I said I'd tell all but I'm not real comfortable with it. I'm not sure that I want this story to be told secondhand. I like to tell my own stories, and I do it rather well – not as often as I like though. My companion and I travel a lot of the time. To look at me you'd never think I'm a storyteller in my heart of hearts. And you'd think one adventure after another would be thrilling but sometimes it's a real pain.

We had to put off our anniversary celebration one year to save a village from slavers. But even that wasn't too bad because it made us feel nostalgic -the saving of a village from slavers is how we met. So all in all, the silk sheets, sweet smelling flowers and bottles of fine wine I prepared for my love wasn't a total waste. They went to good use although it was a day later.

I've often fantasized about settling down in a small town somewhere, giving up the road and all it's headaches – a soft, warm bed as opposed to the hard, cold ground sounds pretty good at times. I know, however, that my love still has her wander lust. She may always have it. And as long as she's at my side that's okay with me. I'd travel to the ends of the earth for her. To tartis and back if she asked. I'd do it for love and because I know she'd do the same for me.

But that's not why you're here. You want the scoop. Okay. . . .

It actually started quite innocently. We'd been travel for over three years together. We were the best of friends. I tried to protect her as well as I could but she always resisted it. She always had to be strong and PROVE herself to me.

We went through a difficult year before we decided to blur the line between love and friendship. But the whole experience made us stronger. I could get into the exacts of the story but that would take too long. Just know that all of humanity was thrown in our faces and we managed to stay standing, together as one. It was shaky, very shaky but we survived and it made our love stronger – stronger than I ever imagined possible.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. It started out innocent. We had just faced down another foe, content with ourselves in the fact we were victorious. It was a warm night so we washed our clothes and decided to let them dry over night. But before settling into bed she suggested we go for a swim and get washed up.

Now keep in mind, I spent months, even before the 'rift' that threatened to destroy us, watching this woman with eager eyes. I often wondered if she could feel me watching her, imagining how it would feel to touch her. She does have many skills and I often wondered if she had eyes in the back of her head (she could always tell what I was doing). Anyway, after all we had gone through, we had finally become physical again. Not in a sexual sense. We were never sexually physical but we often hugged, caressed and even kissed. The contact only lasted for seconds and was always interpreted as a friendly nature. But as time went on my thoughts grew more erotic.

It was an odd experience for me. I was never attracted to women in the physical sense. I've known some beautiful women, some who propositioned me but it never felt right. But with my love. . .with my dear sweet love. . .to not want her, to not desire her felt wrong. She was everything I ever wanted in a soulmate. I was totally drawn. And that night by the river everything changed.

But I'm getting ahead of myself aren't I? Okay. She suggested a swim. It was harmless enough. We did it quite often. Once stripped of our garments I watched her perfect, toned body break the surface of the water as she dove head first. When she reemerged the water droplets trickled down her beautiful face, landing on her lovely breasts.

"Well," she replied from the river. "Are you coming in or not? Don't make me come get you," she ordered.

I just love it when she gets authoritative. It starts my blood racing through my veins, making my skin tingle.

"We wouldn't want that now... would we?" I replied softly. Quickly, I dove in too but I stayed under the surface until I reached her legs. With a quick tug, I pulled with all my might, sending her below with me.

I rose up expecting to find her, but she hadn't surfaced. I felt below the water, but she was no longer there. Panic racked my body and I desperately searched with my hands. Suddenly, she burst up beside me, coughing and spitting the water from her lungs. She wheezed when she tried for her first breath of air and I held her close trying to make her relax.

"Oh gods," I apologized once her breathing returned to normal. "I'm so sorry. I thought you were expecting that."

"Never saw it coming," she croaked.

Suddenly, I realized we were dripping wet, our hearts threatening to pound out of our bodies (not to mention we were tightly rapped around each other). In spite of my sorrow, I still couldn't help but feel aroused. Somehow my fingers found the courage to trace her delicate features of her feminine face. That's the thing about my love – she can look innocent and pure one minute and powerful and determined the next. The look that played on her eyes as I held her, caressed her, was none of these, however. The look I saw was passion and deep desire.

Before I had the chance to second guess myself my lips captured hers. Now as I've said we've kissed... but never like this. My lips burned from the contact yet craved even more. Now remember, I've never made love to a woman before. Never even kissed a woman but that moment, as she stood in my arms in that warm lake, it felt so natural. At first, I must confess, I was a bit worried of how she'd react. However, when I felt her tongue force through my closed lips, fighting for entry, my fears were put to rest. And once that fear was gone... I melted. I melted in that tender embrace.

Her hands caressed my breasts like a lover of many summers. She had experience. That was obvious, but I wasn't sure if I was happy or a bit unnerved by that fact. I mean I was glad she would know what to do, but I was also concerned I wouldn't measure up to her past 'loves'. She, as always, could sense my distress.

"What's wrong?" she asked. Oh that voice. How I love that voice. I told her my fears and she reassured me. "Yes. I have been with a few women before, but I've never been truly in love. Not like this. You're everything I've ever wanted and I feel truly blessed that I've found you."

I felt myself start to cry, thinking of the first time we met. "You did find me, didn't you? You saved me that day. And so many days since... Gods, I love you."

She moved closer and began a gentle assault on my neck and earlobe. I felt her hot breath tickle me; inspire me.

"Xena," she whispered. "I love you too... And you'll always have my heart."

Gabrielle and I walked back to the shore hand-in-hand. She laid me down on the sand and loved me unlike anything I ever experienced before. Every touch, every lick, every nibble brought me closer to Elysia than I ever dreamed possible. And she has taken me to Elysia every night since.

I know when you've been with someone awhile the fascination is supposed to wear off. Desires, they say, cool, getting replaced by a deepening love. All I can say is it's been 10 years since that night we made love for the first time and my wetness still grows when I hear her coo my name.

To me Gabrielle is the bard I always hoped to be but never had the courage to try. She's my protector – from my foes and even myself. She's the woman who could get me to hang up this sword, trading it in for a plow for our farm (Gods as the years go by that bed sounds better and better). And she's still the woman I would give my life to save. Because I realize without her my life would be meaningless.

So I sing of Gabrielle - the girl I met and the woman I love.

The End


End file.
